Grit, Grimace and Personal Truths

Posted by in Body, Mind, Spirit, Discovering Me, Midlife Misadventures coping with midlife crisis | 0 comments

sandbox   In the past I jumped on the New Year’s resolution bandwagon, setting resolutions each year that routinely fell away within 4 weeks 6 if I was particularly vigilant. Even the word resolution has grit, grimace, and struggle plastered all over it.

Resolutions felt hard, distant and just plain icky most of the time. So in 2009 I decided to choose differently, I created a choosing manifesto and chose to begin each year with a path rather than a resolution.  It’s evolved into a Soul Path treasure map. I turn the process inside out starting with the ‘why’ of what I want to create, I look at how it’s connected to my values and what the feeling I’m reaching for is. This creates touchstones for me along the path. These touchstones help with the day to day choices as well as the major decisions.

Over the years I’ve begun to embrace some personal ‘truths’ –

  • I am not overly motivated by external things, they’re nice but not a pull I forward kind of motivator for me.   I need intrinsic inspiration coupled with some extrinsic rewards to keep me moving forward. That’s why tuning in to my why and my values is critical and the monthly treat (massage, concert tixs, shoes- oh yeah the shoes) is a reinforcement with a smile.


  • I prefer to leave things loose, but need some structure – I plan loosely for a year but map semi-tightly for 6 months scheduling time in May to revisit and map the next 6 months. I have my projects penciled in for the full year but the ones in the first 6 months also have action steps attached as well as values/feeling states.


  • I need to keep my values and feeling states close to mind or I get tangled up in ‘should’s’ and the busy-ness of life in a nonproductive way. I put them (vibrant, joyful, engaged, connected, and empowering) in my planner, on my mirror, in my journal to remind myself to check in and look inward first.

Sometimes I get frustrated that this process takes longer than dashing off a resolution but it truly provides me the intrinsic inspiration to fuel my Soul Path and that makes me happy (and I get much better results).  It reminds me to tune in to the energy of what I’m doing, see how it’s resonating with the actual physical experience or expression of it, and adjust as needed. After all playing in my own sandbox is a good prescription to find(and keep) my happy.

How have you adjusted your New Year routine to suit your unique style?

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